A Caretakers Journey

I am learning that being a caretaker is a deep, personal journey & a very special experience. And given that it is family it is always harder. This past week has not been good for Pop's, he is failing and it seems faster each day. Growing up, at least for me, I would think that my grandparents would live forever. As you get older of course you know that isn't possible but still a part of you feels that they are invincible. Now living with them and taking care of them you start seeing that underneath their superhero outfits that they have some wrinkles, walk slower than before and forget things at times. And it's moments where they then say that they need you and it hits you that they won't live forever well at least here on earth. 

I am so blessed and thankful that I have the gospel in my life. The knowledge knowing that I will see those that have passed on before me and those who will pass on after me, that we can still be a family forever. It gives me strength through the day. It is still hard because you wont be able to physically touch them or talk to them here but knowing that they will be here in spirit watching over me is very comforting to know. 

I don't know when his time here is done but I know that it is coming. I know that he has regrets and I know that he is worried about his family and that is normal and understandable. At the same time I am excited for him because he will get to see his two brothers who died in war and were taken to soon and his mommy will get to hold her baby boy once again and he will get to see his father. I can be selfish and not want him to leave, but I know someday I will see him again and knowing that I can live with him again is beyond comforting. 

Life is honestly to short. We don't know when our time is coming nor do we know our family members time. So set pride, jealousy, angry and hate aside and let go. Now is better than never. You don't want to live with regret. It will eat you inside. Send a card or call them up on the phone. You might be surprised how they will act. Family is family regardless how dysfunctional and how crazy they are. Cause in the end they are all we have.

XO {ST}